


Mantras and Talismans

by Hawkwitch



Series: post [10]
Category: Yes Minister, Yes Prime Minister
Genre: Gen, Humor, Post-Canon, Speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 06:25:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4211517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkwitch/pseuds/Hawkwitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Title: Mantras and Talismans<br/>Characters: Jim, Frank, Sir Humphrey, political figures<br/>Genre: Speculation/humor<br/>Rating: G<br/>Warnings: none<br/>Summary: Post-canon, Basil and Dudley are a bit of pain for Jim. There is a problem with campaign funding. Jim is determined at any cost to avoid karma biting his back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mantras and Talismans

„You have lost your touch, Jim.“ Basil said gleefully.  
„What goes around, comes back around.“ Dudley said. „When karma finally hits you in the face, I will be there, just in case it needs some help.“  
„There are special mantras and talismans for avoiding bad karma.“ Frank cut in.  
„Shut up, Weasel, noone asked you!“ Chief Whip snapped.  
The main reason, why Chief Whip had asked Jim to come to the party headquarters was, as it turned out, there was a shortage of funds for the campaign.  
Somehow the stubborn politicians could reconcile their differences over this specific matter.  
Jim had a few words with his old friend Mrs. Dorothy Weinwright of BP and presented his case. Or more like it, he was begging for half an hour. She was wary at first and said that BP had already made its standard campaign contributions to all political parties. If anything else was asked for – and if it was specifically in cash – then some more work was required.  
Then he called another old friend of his – Mr. Charlie Tarlie, The President of Buranda – and reminded him of an ancient loan. He wanted to know, whether it could be partially repaid in cash immediately. Charlie did not rush with an answer either.

///

Sir Humphrey said something. In very many very difficult words.  
Jim was so distraught that he was not even paying attention. Not even pretending to pay attention. Suddenly he turned to Frank and told: „Frank, go get me some of those mantras and talismans!“  
„You mean straight away, Jim?“ Frank asked, a bit surprised.  
„Straight away, Frank!“ Jim commanded. „And, Albert, get me a drinkie. Straight away!“  
He continued ignoring Sir Humphrey and switched on telly.  
„There is absolutely noone to vote for.“ Some guy spoke to a newsreporter on the screen.  
And right after that some trade unionist bawled: „If we go on like this, we are headed for a dictatorship!“  
An elderly lady had some pearls of wisdom to add: „We always get the leaders we deserve. If we become better ourselves, we will also get better leaders.“  
„If this government gets re-elected, this is not only a failure for this country but a failure for humanity.“ An opposition MP, whom Jim knew quite well – Tom Sargent – said.  
„Oh hell!“ Jim moaned sourly. „Humpy, do something!“  
„Do something? What does Prime Minister mean by „do something“?“ Sir Humphrey asked. „If by „doing something“ Prime Minister means chanting mantras then this is beyond the power of your humble servant.“  
„For cripes sake, Humphrey, do something!“ Jim yelled. „Give me a break, you don't want to end up with Basil or Dudley here. Or this guy!“ He waved at the telly.  
„Fair enough, Prime Minister, point taken.“ Sir Humphrey said. „If doing something is really your wish...“ He took the remote control and smashed it into the TV set with frightful precision.

"This is a bit awkward." Albert mumbled.


End file.
